Of roles and characters

Just as method actors live their parts to get immersed in the role, the little actress in my house does too. Although she doesn't quite do the accent and all, she plays her role quite seriously. As little mermaid, she spent a copious amount of time slithering on the floor, asking us "grant me legs!" or "rescue me!" as she has no legs you see. as pochohontas, she implores us not to marry her off and badgers is to bring her on a ship to see "john smith". well, we did just that, in fact, 2 "ships"--the duck tour boat, and the hippo which runs along clark quay. While cruising past some dragon boaters along kallang river, our pochohontas shouted out to them, "hello brave warriors!". these brave warriors waved back but i'm sure they would have puffed up in pride, if they heard what they were called!
These few days, she answers to "Tim" (one of the 5 performers in hi-5) and of course, mum and dad have to take on the other characters accordingly. I'm called "kelly" and bern's called "nathan". What that means is, she won't brush her teeth unless you say "tim, come and brush your teeth", and she'll reply most sweetly "sure, kelly!" I'm not sure who I'll have to play next, but for now, I'm reading her lots of other stories that don't star some female with no legs and such.

Which is worse?

To be puked on or shat on? I should get some voting done on this as I believe most mums have been puked on AND shat on before, and often simultaneously....which is what happened to me recently. Of course, this is NOT to put off potential parents, just to put parenthood in persepective.
The little one woke up from her nap looking rather ill and started whining and complaining about a tummyache. And of course, all asian mums worth their salt would have RUYI oil or eucalyptus oil every ready and a suitable distraction. for us, you tube was it. And then it happened. halfway through little mermaid singing about being part of the human world, the projectile vommitting started. It rained on the ccomputer table (please let it not move near the the keyboard!), the chair (ok, got to pull out the cover), the nearby mattress (aargh!!!! let it not seep through the bedsheet. no no!!oh oh!), the floor (ok, this one can leave for a bit), her, me (eeww!!!ahh! vomit in my hair!!). Given that the little one has only thrown up once in her life when she was still a wee one, this experience of retching was new to her and she was naturally shocked and frightened...which meant she clung on to me, tight as a kuala to a eucalypt tree, awashed with puke and tears.While i pulled off the bedsheet as quickly as i could, opened the door with vommit-filled hands, walked as quickly to the bathroom to get us cleaned, it happened 3 more times, leaving a trail of destruction along the way.You do realise that doing all that with a 13 kg weight attached to your neck is no small feat. AND THEN the OTHER THING happened. off came the clothes to rinse off the little body (which was still firmly attached to the mothership) and then drip drip drip.....a puddle of poo gains momentum and gathers into a neat artistic shape while drizzling down my legs. AAARRRGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

A desperate phone call to the grandparents had all 3 adults (gramps and helper) landing at my doorstep. 2 hrs later. Which by this time, we were all cleaned up and all feeling better. And cheerful. Which left the bewildered SOS team at the gate wondering what the fuss was about..and me feeling rather sheepish about the sharp tone of my SOS call. another day in the life of a mother.

Of Santa Claus and other magical creatures

A casual remark to a friend that the little one is looking forward to receiving presents from Santa this Christmas earned me THE LOOK. Of course, THE LOOK is often nuanced and heavy in subtext, which in summary would say something like "You're teaching her about Santa?? you're a christian!!" I guess this is where hubby and I differ from half the christian population, and on purpose. On purpose because we actually had a deep discussion before we decided that she should be acquainted with Santa, flying reindeer, the tooth fairy, the unicorn, brownies, pixies and other such creatures. As a christian, it is easy to get caught up in the legalities of what you should teach one's child and what you shouldn't. In fact, as a young adult, I even wrote and directed a musical about the true meaning of Christmas where poor Santa got ostracised after the world understood what christmas meant. In fact, I was so righteous about it I got upset that shopping centres depicted Santas and other seemingly unrelated creatures. As I grew older, I've become less legalistic, more measured and I've learnt to see the positive in Santas. As I teach Maeve about baby Jesus and how God loves us so much He sent us His Son, I also allow her to be excited about getting presents from Santa. The St Nicholas story, is also an important one and depending on how one pitches it to their child, can be a wonderful lesson in love and giving.

The magical stories of Santa for me, fall in the category of fairy tales of wonder and adventure that the little one should know about. Without being able to imagine Santa in North Pole, the tooth fairy exchanging good quality baby teeth for tokens, magical fairies hiding in gardens, riding on a magic carpet, being a genie that can grant wishes, what would childhood be like? For us, there is no need to introduce too many realist concepts at this age, the world and gradual age will do it. Eventually, she'll be a appropriately cynical pre-teen and this world will disappear naturally.

I guess I believe sincerely that the ability to dream, to make-believe, to wonder, is the gift of childhood (that hopefully won't be killed by pragmatism). I remember wishing really hard when i was young (and even for a while believing) that I could climb up the magic far-away tree (enid Blyton)and do all the wonderful things like eat sweets that grow in your mouth.Sis and I will make a pact to meet each other "up the tree" and for a golden age, we did.

So while she thoughtfully chooses a gift to give baby Jesus for His birthday, she'll also get a gift under the tree from Santa on Christmas day. But first, she must remember to put out the milk and cookies for him!

Fav phrases of a 2 year old

If i had a dollar for each time these phrases are used, i can buy myself a spa package!

1. I can do it myself.
2. Don't help me.
3. Don't teach me.
4. Don't show me how.
5. I don't want to eat/drink/go out/come in/bathe/brush teeth/wear the ugly dress...
6. Mummy, say sorry to me. APOLOGISE!
7. Mummy, you are a naughty mummy. Stand in the corner! (when she doesn't get her way with me)

While this all sounds pretty negative, i think it comes with the territory of a 2 year old exercising self-will. It is really tempting to DO THE JOB AT HAND for her, such as wearing her shoes as it takes such a long time of repeated attempts and errors, but i have to always remind myself that by NOT DOING, I'm allowing her to learn independence, patience, perseverence, tenacity.So our household spends our time NOT DOING a lot of things, which leads to lots of spills, spagetti-smeared face, clothes worn the wrong way. But! she also learns to self-feed, drink from a cup without spilling too much, mop up after she's spilled, bring soiled clothes to the laundry basket, and be a really good helper at home.

There's also the positive expressions and they mainly consist of
1. Mummy, you're my sweetiheart!
2. Good job mummy!
3. That's well done mummy dar-ning!

I hope I still hear such phrases of affirmation when she goes into her turbulent teenage years!

Feminism re-defined

We've been reading a wide array of fairy tales of late. Little mermaid, 101 dalmations, beauty and the beast...and the one thing they have in common? they all get married at the end (not too disimilar to channel8 drama serials i must say!). all the ladies (including female dogs) to some handsome prince. The feminist in me protests the propagating of such nonsense (and on that note, let me go look for Mulan and Joan of Arc in fairy-tale form), but currently, my litttle princess wannabe is hooked.

princess: mummy, i want to get married.
mummy: (hides look of shocked horror and says in calm, saccharine voice) sure! who do you want to marry?
Princess: (deep in thought, then resolutely)Samuel kor kor.
mummy: um...ok. but i think you need to..
princess: (interrupts)..ask permission? ok.

Mummy makes a mental note to change reading diet. yes, Pochahontas will do it. she DOESN't marry john smith, but vows to build a path of peace, for all visiting ang mohs, show them the "colours of the wind" and stuff like that.

the next day. in church.
As promised, mummy brings the princess to her potential mother-in-law.
princess: (looks seriously at MW, who concerned, bends down to hear her)Can i marry Samuel kor-kor?
MW: ????

To her credit, my dear friend, MW, carries the little one to "propose" to Samuel kor-kor, who by this time, is trying his best to evaporate. You see, the 5 year old DOES understand what "getting married" means, while his 2 year old suitor believes (i think) it means being able to wear a pretty white dress.

Ah well, at least she's got some of the ol girl in her. she didn't quite wait for the prince to look for her. she took charge. All the bra-burners would have been proud.

Toilet training and exhibitionism

Most parents having gone through the whole toilet training thing probably would have experienced this to some extent: their little one turns flasher. well, at least mine is one, still is...and i'm hoping she'll stop before she gets of arrested for indecent exposure, although being exposed to underpants with strawberry shortcake grinning at you may not be too indecent after all!
anyhow, the smug one, as i should call her now, has been extremely proud of her toileting achievements. When she does a pee in the potty, she announces loudly, "everybody clap!". we dutifully ooh and ahh. when its a poo, you'd better make sure the applause is nothing short of thunderous. so now she's showing off the little underpants to all and sundry. day 1, the 3 little boys next door got flashed at when they passed our gate and called out to her. their mum was suitably horrified...while my smug one grinned with pride. day 2 had her flashing at the grandparents, in public no less. So while i want to share her achievements (especially since technically, i didn't toilet train her, she did it herself by declaring suddenly, "i don't want diapers" and flatly refused to wear it anymore.)and celebrate each milestone, i need to also gently introduce the concept of public and private, which is an irritating concept to her. While keep successes private? shout it from the mountaintops man! so if you get flashed at by a certain 2 year old, please ohh and ahh accordingly with thunderous applause ok? For now. Till further notice.

Gallop Stables on children's day

it was a beautiful, cool wed morning. perfect weather to go outdoors and outdoors we did! We spent the day at the Gallop Stables in Pasir Ris (its at Carpark C, smack between white sands and some other mall, elias?) where the little one very merrily fed the miniature horses with horse food (which we told her was carrots and brocolli to make the little horses grow-therefore-you-must-eat-your veges!). It says the activity was suitable for those above 7, but frankly, who above 7 would be so interested in feeding little horses?
the other attractive activity was pony riding which unfortunately, would not suit her till she's a bit older and able to hold on to the reigns without letting go. hopefully, that'll happen in a few months. it costs $10, which is well worth it seeing the faces of the children light up in sheer delight! What's also nice is it has an attached cafe which overlooks the pony riding track. this cafe also has 3 swings, which was very popular with maeve (she had to sit in each one in turn). after that was a little walk along the swamp where we could hear the sounds of gurgling water close by and little insects chatting with each other. a real good teaching experience as well, as we talked about still water, running water, what causes swamps to happen etc.will definitely make it a fortnightly place to visit.