Like all mums, i followed the new baby bonus measures with keen interest. Would there be measures that help sort out work-life balance (ie. shut office buildings at 7 sharp so that parents will be forced to go home and interact with kids? on that note, friends in Melbourne usually have to dash off by 5pm to pick kids up from day care or else they get left at the police station or something. Besides, they need to go home and cook and do some weeding and iron some clothes. another friend reported that the security guard routinely chases him out at 7 as he's the only sucker left in the office building!); measures that recognise the importance of dad's in the whole baby equation (as i've always said to anyone who'd listen, 3 days does not a dad make.)by giving dad's paternity leave and flexibility to take more time off to help, even if only to be awake at 3am to help bring the baby to mum for milk; measures that make bringing baby out a little less stressful (i've hardly used the pram as maeve has always been in a sling and later, a backpack or on her own two feet) as it really is quite crazy trying to take a train or a bus with a little one. Just last week,i was on the MRT carrying her AND a big diaper bag, desperately trying to cling on to the MRT bars. Of course i wasn't offered a seat. But being the thick skinned person i was, i stood in front of those marked out seats (the ones you're meant to give up to people like me) and politely told the person in the seat to vacate it if you please. Unfortunately, the average mum doesn't have the hide of a rhino like me, so they endure it and pray desperately they and their bundle don't crash or slip. Maybe we're too polite to tell others off when they are not civic conscious. As a student overseas, i've heard the elderly scold young ones for occupying those seats, or a whole lot of people shouting at a queue jumper, so why haven't we the collective conscience to do likewise? So what i'd ask for in the new baby measures, is collective conscience, or plain civic mindedness.
I applaud the new initiatives although most won't apply to me. i don't work in a single organisation full time (although i work quite a bit) so the maternity leave won't apply to me. i don't intend to send maeve to child care, but a 3 hr kindy instead, so the subsidies won't apply either. The IVF subsidies don't appply as it only applies to fresh cycles (which i've been told in no uncertain terms by my gynae will probably ensure a repeat of my near death experience). i do however benefit from the tax rebates if i do have another one and a top-up of a baby bonus fund with another one (IF God grants us another one). So really, God provides through the state. It isn't necessary but it is a bonus.
I'm really wondering why the government throws all this money at parents when what parents want is something entirely different. we want guilt-free time with our children, we want to be able to leave the workforce for a bit (or work flexibly from home) in the formative years, which most child experts would say are the most vital years and re-enter when they are older.So while the powers that be have held focus sessions with parents, i'm not sure what sort of parents they held it with that would demand more money.surely having children has nothing to do with money? one wouldn't have more just because the state's giving money, in fact, it might just work the other way round.
All in all, i'm glad I have been able to make the decisions i made so that i have lots of time with maeve (although i wish part-timing was available when i had her so i didn't need to quit). i would consider it as building of sufficient good will that i can call upon during her impending difficult teenage years.I'm glad we're not stretched financially, that hubby has a stable, steady job. We have no debt except for a housing one which we hope to pay off real soon, we've got a helper who serves as my personal tutor on motherhood with her immense experience being a mother of 4, we've got wonderful parents who are so willing to help and would bend over backwards for their grandchildren.My parenthood journey has been nothing short of a miracle where i've experienced blessing upon blessing.Do i need financial motivation to have more? definitely not, i'll have many more in a heartbeat.
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