maeve's baptism

25th march 2007. maeve gets a sprinkling of water on her head. fun for her and ultimately more for us than for her. although there are huge theological debates about whether one should baptise an infant, after all, they don't understand a thing, but bern and i feel it is more of a dedication and affirmation on the part of the parents, to publically declare that they will bring their child up to be Christ-centred and to love God, and to be accountable to the church in that committment. hence, maeve's baptism. we hope that when she grows up, she will once again, take that step of faith and reaffirm that decision that was made for her as a baby.

perth

perth is a beautiful place...we think....we didn't get to spend much time taking in the sights and sounds as most of our time was spent in the house/apartment depending on when maeve wakes. even so, we did walk along the river, the beach, we did some window shopping, and maeve was of course an instant celebrity. all the little old women wanted to carry and cuddle her! which is fine by me, gives my poor ol arms a break! what was really good though was bernard and i managed to have some couple time, snuggling to watch aussie TV while maeve slept, chatting while we strolled along the beach. and that was what perth was really about.

maevie vs mommy. round 1!

i believe 6 month old babies have wills of their own. they are not placcid nor blur and in fact, highly intelligent and evolved at this stage. i can see it my my bub's eyes. that fiery look that says "aah...if i scream at this decibel, mom will come running. if i keep at it long enough, mom will whip out the boob". it is all a baby conspiracy really. bernard came to that conclusion yesterday too when she stopped her shannanigans to listen to bern blow-drying his hair. when he was done, she started up again. of course, bedraggled mommy had it and left the room, turning the TV volume up and left daddy to tend to her. i should do it every night as maevie fell asleep after 30 mins of crying. with me, no way, it goes on forever! maybe i should start part-time work. it may give me my sanity back, some social interaction, some time away from the house and i would appreciate and miss maeve so much more. might be good for both of us.

throw away those baby books!

i've broken every cardinal rule in any baby book. i've nursed maeve to sleep EVERY TIME she wakes, brought her into my bed, rocked her...i guess i'll suffer the consequences of accidental parenting later. but right now, as Janice says, do what flight attendants tell you: tend to yourself first then tend to the child. and i must do whatever it takes to get some sleep. let's hope she doesn't act up so much when we take her to perth or i'll have a lot of apologising to do.

sleepless in simei

it is 12.45am and maeve has been crying for almost 2 hrs.i cried along with her the last half hour before deciding to leave the room and type and prevent myself from going ballistic or mental or both. bernard upped and left for the guest room long ago. i don't begrudge him as he needs to work and had a really tiring day, but i do wish i had a spare husband. one to work and another to take turns comforting the baby with me.i'm opposed to letting her cry it out, but after patting non stop, carrying and soothing, she still screamed and short of looking at her and shouting SHUT UP SHUT UP MOMMY"S GOING MENTAL, the only other option is to let her cry herself to sleep. interestingly though, when i burst into tears of frustration just now, it stopped her crying for a while, just to check out what on earth mommy is doing. HOWEVER, when i stopped sobbing, wiped my tears, she started up again. now, blessed silence, only because she's cried herself to sleep, which breaks my heart and makes me feel really guilty. what if she lands up in therapy for the rest of her adult life as a result? ahh...i pray tomorrow will be a better night and she'll outgrow this.

solids!

i decided to feed maeve solids yesterday. i hoped it would keep her full and asleep at night. she is so ready for it as she kept "helping" me feed her and protested angrily when we were done. of course, lots of it landed on her bib, rather than in her mouth but who's counting. verdict? she still woke several times a night. perhaps it is not to feed and she just needs comforting and a good cry before she goes back to bed, but now, i am taking the path of least resistance. i nurse and put her back to bed. it beats sitting by her cot and patting for an hour while she screams and hyperventilates. i know. i know. if she becomes obese and has an obsession with comfort food, it'll be totally and utterly my fault.

the sink is choked!

yikes! i've got a blocked duct from hell! its been 3 days and i still have a hard wedge that hurts to high heaven, especially when she nurses. have read every single website on blocked ducts and tried every solution to no avail. the latest is to stuff a hot, wet diaper into my shirt and the heat is supposed to help. i'm now wearing a hot wet diaper on my chest. i really hope no one comes by for a visit as it will be a sight to behold. dad was around just now and has been shooting me weird looks but accepts the antics of his crazy daughter. nothing surprises him anymore where i am concerned! i just hope it heals before tomorrow as i've got to go to school and i don't want my boob exploding in pain when the principal makes his address.i'm so tempted to give in and do the formula thing, but i keep telling myself, IT IS WORTH IT. those antibodies i'm giving her. IT IS WORTH IT. OOOOUUUCCCCHHHH!!!!